When I first heard that my parents were adopting, I was kinda shell-shocked. At the time, my life was at rock-bottom. I was in the middle of an abusive marriage. I had no friends and a new “family” (my in-laws) that hated me. Most importantly, I had no hope.
My first reaction to the adoption news was purely selfish. I felt a sense of abandonment. My husband used these feelings to further alienate me from my dad. It took me a few months to get off of my high horse. I was in a communications class at the time. So I decided to do a speech on orphans, Ukraine, adoption, and all that good stuff. It was supposed to be a 3 minute speech. Once I got started, I couldn’t stop! I talked with a fiery passion for about 15 minutes. I got an A!!
It took me about another year to get my head on straight. I left my husband on January 3rd of this year. I bounced around from home to home for about 6 months after that, including a battered women's shelter.
I first met my new brother and sisters, when I came to Colorado on a one week visit this summer. The acceptance I felt when I walked through the front door was overwhelming. I was first approached by Julia. She eyed me over and asked, “Jessica, are you my sister too?” I told her I was. She thought about this for a moment, grinned big, and asked “Ok, can I paint your nails?” I wanted to cry.
I realize now that this was God’s plan. These kids were delivered from awful conditions and so was I. I accepted God into my heart, and he gave me a new family and new friends.
~ Jessica, age 22 ~
Serenity Prayer (my favorite)
God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can; and wisdom to know the difference.
Living one day at a time; Enjoying one moment at a time; Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace; Taking, as He did, this sinful world as it is, not as I would have it; Trusting that He will make all things right if I surrender to His Will;
That I may be reasonably happy in this life and supremely happy with Him Forever in the next. Amen--Reinhold Niebuhr
12 comments:
Jessica,
What a beautiful post. Thank you for your boldness and willingness to share your heart. I will be praying for you as you seek God's will in the days to come, and I thank Him for working in your life! How wonderful that He created family for us here on earth, a how wonderful that it's only a glimpse of what is yet to come!
Jenn in Georgia
Jessica,
Thank you so much for sharing. You post touched my heart!!
Sheila
Jessica,
Very well said!!! Thanks for "adopting" these kids right along with your dad and mom!!!
Jessica,
I love your post and your openness and honesty. You hang in there because God has a plan for your life. He never gives us anything that we can't handle. Hold strong to your faith in Him and to your beautiful family.
Tina Bell
Jessica eloped and married without our knowledge about three years ago. For the next two years, communication with her was practically nonexistant and her whereabouts where unknown, until I got word that she was in a battered women's shelter. It was a father's worst nightmare and I felt that I failed jessica in some way.
Jessica has moved home and lives with us now and we are ecstatically happy and pleased. Our deal with Jessica is that she does all she can and takes this opportunity to get her life back on track. We shower her with love and praise and we feel like we have our daughter back...almost like an adoption in itself!
She is enrolled in divorce care and grief counseling at our church, she attends these classes twice a week including Sunday worship. Jessica is doing well an is in recovery and we all encourage and appreciate your prayers for her.
I am so happy and thankful to God to have my "first little girl" back! Praise Him!
Felix
Jessica, thanks for sharing. We pray that God continues to heal your heart and lead you in His ways.
Felix, that's for sharing, too!
Jessica,
I love your transparency. God bless you as you move forward in the days ahead. You've got a terrific family!
Jessica,
Great to hear from you regarding your feelings about the expansion of your family. I wish you every positive accomplishment you achieve in your bright future. Enjoy this time to be with your new family.
Mayme
Jessica, thank you for sharing this. I am glad to hear of how things are going for you now and that you have the love of your new brother and sisters, too.
And Felix, thank you for sharing Jessica's story. I'm praising God with you and Heidi that she is with you now!
You know Jesus is in that house. Julia makes me giggle. I'm so glad you are there Jessica. It is an awesome place to be.
eileen
Jessica-
You are so courageous, and we are all incredibly blessed that you are back here in Colorado now! Thanks for sharing your heart. It is beautiful.
Love,
Kari
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