News to pass on...

I received the following comment today from a friend, Eric. Are you looking?

Heidi and Felix, I do not have your email, but my wife posted a picture of two boys from Ukraine on her blog, if you know of anyone who would possibly be interested, have them contact us. They are great kids. http://loving-da-bears.blogspot.com/2010/09/do-you-know-their-mom-and-dad.html

There are a few kids from previous camps we know that want families as well. Visit the UOO website and contact us there for more information.

In other news, I've been made aware of another supposed moratorium on adoption. I quit worrying about this as I stated back in June. This is the first time that I have heard that Ukraine voted twice in the same year, though. I do pray everyday about it, but I put it in God's hands and trust that He will take care of it. A friend informed me...

The information is sketchy, but many reliable contacts are telling us that Ukraine's government is scheduled to vote on Tuesday, September 21st to stop adoptions with countries that do not have a written agreement with them (an agreement to protect the children). As I understand, the only country with this agreement in place right now is Israel. Please pray this vote does not pass!!! While it is important to protect the children, we want these agreements and changes to be made without putting a stop to current adoptions. There are many children whose time is running out. They need homes. They need families. They may need therapy or medical attention. They may need a family before they age out of the system. Whatever the case, a moratorium could mean the end of the possibility of family for them. Before you go to bed on September 20, pray that this vote will either not even come up, or that it will not pass.

Lastly, Lizzie still wants to come home! Pray for her, the moratorium vote and all the orphans world over who sleep alone each night.

~ Tet'ka Felix ~

September Babies!

Just a quick post to let you all know that we are alive and well. School is in full swing and Kole and I are the only boys in the "House of women". Like I told my daughter, Jessica, I don't run the place...I just pay the bills!

As the title says, this is a big birthday month around the house. Starting us off on the 12th was Heidi's B-Day! Rimma's will be on the 22nd and mine will be on the 24th. I'm resisting the urge to combine R's and my birthday's into one party, cake, etc. My mom did that when I was growing up with me and my sister. Her birthday is on the 26th.

Seated L to R; Laura our German exchange student, Jessica, Rimma, Julia, Nadia, Felix, Jordan, the Birthday girl - Heidi, and Kole

In other news (wonderful news, I might add), our pastor has decided to join the ranks of Ukie adoptive parents! He and his wife are pursuing a 15 year old girl that has been on the minds and hearts of Karen Springs and Yulia. I had seen a little Facebook traffic between our pastor and Karen these past couple of weeks, but thought nothing of it other than God's people connecting through Him. Surprise, surprise! He announced the decision during last weeks message and it was quite an emotional event for him and for us Grace Place members. I don't think I've ever seen Pastor Clay get emotional. It has made Heidi cry (happy) every time she listens to the sermon and I admit, I get a little choked up, too. Click on "Grace Place - Our Church" and navigate your way through the website to find his sermon on September 12th. Wow, what a wonderful miracle!

We are drawing closer to getting our dossier together to go after Lizzie. We finished the homestudy awhile back and completed our forms for the USCIS. Our fingerprinting appointment is this Friday morning and we are excited to check of this important step. Heidi started her medical work this week and I will begin in the next few days as well. We want to have our dossier there and get submitted sometime in October. Unless a miracle occurs, Lizzie should not be eligible until mid-January. We are just getting our dossier there before the November-December slow-downs and cutoffs. (No, there isn't a hold on adoptions and we don't have any inside information, but past experience has shown us that the SDA starts end-of-year closures and slow-downs around this time frame)

I got the following Facebook message from Lizzie last Saturday:

Can't wait going my home!!!I love you!!!you are my Daddy(Tet'ka) forever!!!

Been grinnin' like an idiot ever since!

~ Tet'ka Felix ~

"This was my favorite..."

I asked Lizzie shortly before she left to tell me what, other than being in her family and with Mom & Dad, was her favorite activity this summer. "I loved the camping", she said. "This was my favorite thing to do." Seeing how we may go camping again this Labor Day weekend, I thought it fitting to do a post on camping with Lizzie.

Although the summer days can reach the 90's and 100's in Colorado, it's always cooler in the mountains. Nights dip to the 50's. Rimma brought her pink blanket.

The nearby stream at our hidden secluded campsite is always a kid favorite. Quite chilly with too much cfm's in the early Spring runoff, it turns into a kid's delight by summer.

There are miles of "wade-able" water for the kids to enjoy. It's like having a swimming pool at your campsite!

Tent-mates doing a self shot photo

Can't wait to return next Spring and Summer with her. Perhaps she would like to fly-fish with Dad!

~ Tet-chka Felix ~

Separation

As the plane pushed backed, I couldn't shake the feelings of emptiness that came over me. As she was sitting there on that plane in this moment, I tried to imagine the sadness she was enduring and tears that were falling. I hope she kept reminding herself that Mom and Dad would come as soon as possible. Even with my five kids at home and our new exchange student having just arrived, I still find myself walking around with that empty feeling like something just isn't right, someone is missing...my Lizzie.

Back in the Spring, when we committed to bring Lizzie home for the summer, I knew this moment would come. I knew we would eventually have to pay the price, or face the music as my old man used to say. I pray that is the only price we have to pay. I fear we may have done more harm than good. There are the threats from a cold, harsh chaperon who will remain nameless...and this will be the last time I ever speak of it. Despite repeated attempts to "win the hearts and minds" of this person, we were rebuffed again and again. In the latter stages we just realized that no one can reason with an insane person. Never before in my own home have I been so insulted, judged, watched, uncomfortable! Parting words to me from this person were, to say the least, astonishing and revealing of true character and intent. I now know why I didn't shed a tear when Lizzie walked away, down the jet way. I was bewildered!

I just can't write here all the awful stuff we endured or heard. Heidi and I stood fast and bore it for Lizzie's sake and sanity and we don't regret having her for one minute. The good times far outweigh the bad ones from the chaperon and it was good to build more bonds of trust and love with Lizzie. We would do it all over again, thank goodness we won't have to! She will be home for good early next year.

Lizzie has a good head on her shoulders and is keen to the perils she has to face. She told us many stories while she was here. It's remarkable what she has seen and avoided. Drug use, shooting up, prostitution, drinking have all been in the same room with Lizzie, yet she has managed to escape their attention. She is wise beyond her years and more mature than she should be for her age. Perhaps because she has seen more in her short young life than I will see in my entirety. I know God looks over Lizzie and protects her and that He sent her to us three years ago.

If you think I'm making this stuff up or that things like this don't happen, go read Tom Davis' book, Priceless. Read his other book Scared too! The movie, Taken, might get your attention as well. Then get involved, somewhere, anywhere, even in the US. There are more Lizzies out there!

Lizzie sent a message this morning on Facebook that she had arrived back at the orphanage, two days after she left home. Her message, as follows and not respelled or cleaned up, paints a potential problem. We pray it is something as simple as her phone was stolen or she lost her favorite bed.

hi,Daddy!!!how are you????i miss you so much!!!i have big problems!!I don't
want to say about!!!but we know you love us,and we love you!!!i'm in orphanage
in Kherson!!!and Ukraine is garbigge!!!

The father part of me wants to lecture her about calling that country "garbage". The daddy part of me just says, "I Love and miss you terribly, sweetie" In my present state of mind, guess which reply I sent. From here on out, we will write about the great times we had with her and the happiness with our growing family. Stay with us...

~ Tet-chka Felix ~

A Day with Lizzie

Lizzie flies back to Ukraine tomorrow. After she leaves, I will post a few blogs about our time together. I intentionally didn't write much these past 10 weeks while she was here. We wanted to spend as much time with her and enjoy the moments. It was a great experience for her and for us. Her English skills soared and now we will have more to talk about when we call her. She was in her family and got to preview things to come. Father and daughter bonds were cemented and she is more of a Daddy's girl than ever before. She has a new name for me...Tet-chka. Cute, and I melt every time she uses it. I'm gonna miss that, and her!

We are going to spend the whole day with her, Heidi and I took off from work to do so. We are doing fine with the departure. The only hint of tears came two nights ago when I asked Lizzie if she ever had a Daddy before or did she remember her father. She held me tightly and started crying. She said "No, you are the only daddy I have ever had." I felt bad after having asked the question. It reaffirmed the need that girls need moms and dads.

Last night Rimma came and sat with me on the sofa, putting her arms around me. She said, "Thank goodness I am home and I never have to return". Lizzie and Rimma get it!

~ Felix ~

18 days 'till Camp Ukraine

Everywhere I look, the signs are there that school will be starting back up soon. Last year this time, I posted a funny commercial that I remembered about “the most wonderful time of the year” for parents. This year I’m a bit melancholy about the whole thing. That’s because this summer, we had Lizzie at home and she will depart on the 28th of August.

However, I’m not torn up inside about it like I was when we put Rimma & Lizzie on that plane back in 2007, never knowing if we would ever see them again, if we would get to adopt them, if they would be safe and sound until we got there. Those worries prompted the trip in April of ’08. No, rather, I am comforted by the fact that we will be there to get her early next year. In that regard, she has to go back. We regret that the date approaches, but we don’t dwell on it or dread it.

Quite simply, in our conversations with Lizzie, we all have come up with a term for the few months of separation we will endure. Lizzie herself will tell you that she’s not going home, she IS HOME! No, she’s going away to “Camp Ukraine”, sometimes referred to as “boarding school” from which she will be plucked out of in due time. We tell her that she better enjoy the last few months of her life in Ukraine. Enjoy the food, enjoy the music, enjoy the culture, ‘cause Dear Ole Dad won’t be traveling back there post-adoption anytime soon!

Lizzie agrees, too! She sees the longing by adopted Ukie kids (there are quite a few in our community) to go back for a visit, to go back and see friends, to go back and be in the culture. We realize this with Nadia and Rimma. Nadia has gotten over it and hardly ever asks about calling or visiting her old Diestky Dom. Rimma misses one friend and a cousin she hardly ever got to see. We allow contact, but both girls are slowly getting past their loss. Lizzie, on the other hand, wants nothing to do with Ukraine once she leaves.

One could argue that she is sheltering herself and will come to miss her past. She and I will tell ya, there is nothing left for her in Ukraine but hurt, abandonment, a care taker who hates her and a director that threatens her.

Last week, she told me that she wants to be like Kole and forget the Russian language. I cautioned her against that saying that a brilliant career could be had by speaking both languages. I mentioned to her about being a linguist working at an Embassy or a company that does business with Russian-speaking countries, being a flight attendant on trans-Atlantic flights doing the same, or about the need for mission work bringing Christ to those countries. She lit up as I discussed those possibilities. Her smile was evident as she stated, “I want to help the orphans and people who speak Russian when they come to America, but I want to work from here helping people.”

So, for the meantime, Lizzie is done with Ukraine. Hopefully, time will ease her hurt and erase all bad memories. God kept her there to do his work these past three years. Lizzie has aided, comforted and helped convince 4 of 5 orphans when they were struggling between adoption or staying at the orphanage and taking their chances. Lizzie should have been the first one home, but I now see that was the task that He had for her to do. She has done enough for now, I would agree.

In 18 days Lizzie will leave for “camp” and for the last time we will say our Goodbyes. A part of the family will be missing and a piece of our hearts will fly away on that plane. It is our prayer that God will remove all obstacles and will deliver her home forever. May the next five months fly away as fast as these 10 summer weeks have.

~ Felix ~

Building Memories

"Awesome!" That was the most heard word from the kids this past weekend, especially from Lizzie. It felt good to hear that word and to bask in the warmth of kids having summer fun. We went to our "secret" camping site in Colorado with all the kids this weekend. A few years back before kids, Heidi and I scouted for a hidden secluded spot in the Rockies to do some camping. I wanted a rugged 4-wheel drive path in and out and water in the form of a lake or stream. We found both near the Red Feather Lakes area of Colorado...and I get to fly fish!

Heidi mentioned several times this weekend that these are family memories that we are building and how important these times together were for all of us. My friends, Pam & Kevin, reflected recently about their fond memories of family time while camping, too. As I think back, those were my favorite times as a kid. I agree with them all. We bond, love, laugh, learn and enjoy time away from the hectic call of life at home. It's just different than being at home, time like this gives you opportunity to see the things you miss daily and to spend special quality time with your family. I know, that this experience and the ones to come, will teach our kids to value family even more. They are even learning experiences to pass on to their kids one day.

Lizzie pauses to take in the beauty

Nothing better than kids fishing!

...unless, of course, it's Dad fishing!

Two Butterflies!

Marshmellows & Smores over a campfire, NICE!

The Shish-ka-bob Queen!

Shish-ka-bobs and buttered potatoes on the fire, Mmm GOOD!


Hummingbirds at the Trader Store. The next morning a hummingbird & squirrel got into a fight in the tree above our tent. No sleeping in that morning!

Whipping the Parachute Adams fly!

Wading the stream

Gettin' wet

Nice Catch!