OK, I’ll start off by admitting that this post is a rip-off from our friends, the Landrum’s! Back in January 2008, Leslie wrote a cute post about the math of raising a large family. It is hilarious! She is my favorite blog writer and I love the way she tells the story. I wish I could write half as well as she. Perhaps it has something to do with the fact that she is an English teacher? Therefore, I’ll go with the old saying, “Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery”. She wrote:
It first hit me that some things just aren't going to be the same when I wasThat got me to thinking as well. Right now, we are a family of five. Six when you take into the fact that our daughter Jordan comes home every Spring break, Thanksgiving or Christmas break and all summer. On the rare occasion that my oldest daughter Jessica comes in from out-of –state, we could swell to seven. Every two weeks or so, I go and pick up my “little”, Joe, from the Big Brother, Big Sisters program and he hangs out with me and the family. That makes eight! Rimma and Zina will be here for three weeks in August and we will one day have them home for good. Now we are nine minus Joe, ten with him. Nine is an odd number and lately I’ve been thinking that we could add an extra kido to the R & Z adoption trip in 2010. You know, make it an even ten. Normal household numbers could be eight by 2010! Don’t even get me started on the kids each summer on the UOO camp!
grocery shopping and realized that my brand of breakfast sausages only came six
to a pack. Now I am off mathematically! Also, when we dine out the gratuity is
automatically included in our bill as if we are a party of people or something.
There are no additional legal seating options left in our car. When I cook
breakfast I use eighteen eggs and an entire pack of bacon. Our washing machine
broke so we went to the laundry mat to do our clothes. We occupied fifteen
washing machines (almost the entire laundry mat)!! We take up a pew and a
quarter at church and a whole block when we ride our bikes. There are a few
perks that we now have as well. If we use the hair cut card that you get stamped
for each cut, we automatically qualify for a free cut. And if we go to get ice
cream we use up all the stamps in one shot, immediately qualifying us for a free
With those numbers, think of the pints, the pounds, the prices and the perks. Feel free to comment and give me your additions. (Yep, audience participation required.)
- We could field our own baseball team!
- We could play both sides of the court in basketball!
- A package of hot dog buns won't be enough!
- Neither will a pack of hot dogs
- Sam's club or Costco would love us!
- Cheaper by the dozen won't be just a movie anymore!
- The washer & dryer would no longer be considered "durable goods"
- HOV lane would take on a whole new meaning (high occupancy vehicle)
- Friends may never invite us to dinner again! (that's a bad thing)
- John & Kate plus eight would seem like a situation comedy!
- I would lose weight easily, no food in the house, ever!
- Heidi's full time job would be coupon clipping and "gov'ment cheese" getter!
- We would be on a first name basis with the Goodwill and Dollar store folks!
- We too, would take up a couple of pews and a side of the school bus!
- Suddenly, a blue ray disk at $30 is a bargain compared to a night at the movies!
- Buffet restaurants shiver at the sight of the gray Rogé transport box (pictured above)
- A 12 passenger van that gets 16 MPG is a gas saver compared to 4 cars @ 30 MPG!
- We would save the lives of many children and give opportunity to many more generations!
- These children would enrich our lives and we would be following Christ's charge to all!
OK, hit me with more. I've got a lot of comical friends out there. I know you have at least one or two.
~ Felix ~